(Five minute Friday. Linking with Lisa Jo Baker. Prompt: Worship)
God, it’s me, your daughter. And I have a confession to make.
I’ve been sharing my worship with another. Well, actually more than one.
Yes, I’ve come and sat with others on Sundays to worship you.
But I didn’t come with a single heart. It was divided.
I sang the songs, I went through the motions, but my heart wasn’t on you alone.
I was worried. Silently I wondered how it would feel if I didn’t have these bills pressing on me.
I worshipped money.
I thought about what it would feel like to have a book that everyone read.
I worshipped prestige.
I wondered what those around me thought of me.
I worshipped the opinion of others.
It’s not that I didn’t think of you God. I did. I think highly of you.
It’s just that you don’t occupy all my heart. Not all the time.
You said to love you with all of my soul, and all of my mind and all of my strength.
I fail sometimes God.
And you are deserving of worship not just on days when I know all my bills are paid and things are moving along nicely.
But on those days when I have no clue what you are doing. How the next bill will be paid.
Thank you Lord, for being patient with me.
And help me to worship you with my whole heart. Not half of my heart.
In Jesus name, I pray. Amen.
A heart touching recap for apology
Shabbir, I’m just so glad that God knows our hearts. Even when we don’t get the words out, he sees us through and through. And no one can love us like the Lord. No one.
Enjoyed this post Anne. God has been reminding me lately that He loves me the same even on my worst day and it amazes me He so freely gives to us what we struggle to reciprocate. So many times I find myself in awe of God’s patience towards me. Thanks for the reminder that we are called to love God with all our soul, mind and strength.
Tammy,
I don’t know anyone who doesn’t need this reminder. Sometimes I’m aware I’ve forgotten this when I’m not doing well and I don’t feel I have the right to go to God. Almost like it’s a position I’ve earned. Only a sinner, saved by grace. Sometimes we forget that. Thanks for taking the time to read my post and for your comments. Knowing he loves us on our worst days gives us such freedom to go to him any day.
Tamara,
I appreciate your taking the time to read this. And I agree. If we take the time to just acknowledge what we’re doing our hearts are getting to the right place. Soft. It’s when we refuse to face it that they harden up and we find all kinds of excuses why we are where we are, and what it will take to get us out of there. Acknowledgement is the first step.
Loved the honesty in your writing. I think it’s something we all struggle with sometimes. What we worship may look different than the next person, but we all have those things we worship instead of God. There’s truly freedom in saying sorry to God for it. Somehow it turns our hearts back to Him with our worship.
Dear Anne,
“I am sorry, God for worshipping things that really is not all that important in my life.” This past week I too had issues, not financial but with my marriage. And you know, somehow, saying sorry helped. Thank you Anne, for this post. It’s brilliant in it’s simplicity about what really matters in our lives.
Patricia,
It’s easy for the enemy to get out eyes on the wind and the waves, anything to get them off the Savior. I’m sure it was emotionally packed taking down the sails. You made a comment that alluded to that on a pic. Hopefully, today is a better day. Thanks for reading, and for your encouraging comment.