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I’m Gonna Pray, Olivia


I know the doctors are not giving you
much of a chance, but I’m gonna pray.
They hold test results in their hands,
my hands are empty.

God tells me to cast all my cares on Him.
And I care about you.
So I’m gonna pray.

I know God knit you together in your mommy’s womb.
He chose each and every part.
Every single cell.

I don’t presume to know what God’s doing.
He told me his ways are not my ways.
His thoughts are not my thoughts.
I believe that.

But God is the author of life.
He’s the lover of children.
So I’m gonna pray.

And then I’ll know I did what I could.
The only thing —the best thing.
I brought you up to the Father.
The one who loves you more than I ever could.

So Olivia, I just want you to know,
I’m praying for you.
It’s what Grandmas do.

I love you.

This Post Has 25 Comments

  1. Tracy Stella

    Praying for you, Ann, and that God works a miracle for little Olivia. I join with you, lifting little Olivia up to the Father who knits us together and knows us intimately. Lord, we know how much you treasure little Olivia and all those who love her as well. Walk with them, too, Lord during this stormy season. Help them to feel as close to you as a breath. Shower them with your grace and give them many reminders of your goodness and your faithfulness, Father. Sometimes in a storm those are hard to see. Clear the storms and the raging winds, bring your perfect peace as only you can as the God of all comfort. Thank You, Lord, that you give us Hebrews 13 – where you remind us of your promise that you never leave us, and where you remind us in Hebrews 13:8 that you are the same yesterday and today and forever. All-powerful, miracle performing, grace-giving God, maker of all things, good, faithful, and loving. You created little Olivia and we know You hold her gently in the palm of your hand. Thank you for the full-assurance that you love your children even more than we can imagine, overflowing, immeasurable. Amen.

      1. Tracy Stella

        A resilient group of women you are! Beautiful, Anne.

    1. katinavaselopulos

      What a beautiful prayer!

  2. katinavaselopulos

    A beautiful heartfelt poem, Anne! Olivia is so lucky to have come into your family. You are all amazing people and I know in my heart your were meant to spend this time …together. Praying for the little one and for all of you. God listens and even though He might seem like He is not doing much, He is with all of you, feeling your love and pain.

    May He soften the hurt and if possible give you the answers to the question you might not even dare ask.

    Always, love!

    1. annepeterson

      Katina,

      Thank you for reading and commenting, but even more for your concern and prayers for me and my family. It means a lot to me. And to them as well.

      1. katinavaselopulos

        Love you Anne!

        1. annepeterson

          Love you too, Katina. And I am so thankful for your prayers.

  3. lmccy

    Beautiful

    1. annepeterson

      Thanks for reading Laura. And thanks even more for all your prayers.

  4. poetry joy

    A beautiful prayer-poem that reaches out to support Olivia in the best way possible. Test results are concrete and frightening but our heavenly Father is bigger and greater than them. As you hand her care and development over to the One who made her, you are doing “what grandmas do” and doing all God wants of you right now as you rest in Him and His provision for you all. Praying for you and the rest of the family as you wait with faith for her to arrive. May you feel lifted, supported, calmed and encouraged by knowing God hears your every prayer and the silent cries of your heart. Xx

  5. annepeterson

    Joy,

    Thanks for the read and for your heartfelt comment. It’s one thing to know truth, to hold it before you and swear to believe it. It’s quite another when you see what you care about before you possibly slipping away. And you hear, “Do you trust me?”

    More than ever I can relate to, “Lord I believe. Help my unbelief.” The enemy is forever tormenting me and reminding me of all my losses.

    And then I’m also reminded of who was there with each and every one. Even with my mom. Because God knew I would be His daughter one day. I’m certain He was there. And He gave me the verse, “When your father and your mother forsake you, I will lift you up.”

  6. ajicpoems1

    As your hearts beat together and the prayers of the ‘saints’ surround you,the angels must rejoice and our Lord will surely be smiling. Trust and believe and as you Anne and my wife Sandra and I found, He the Creator sees the whole picture even when we can’t fully understand.

    1. annepeterson

      Love the image of the prayers of the saints around me. Thanks for reading. And you’re right the Creator does see the whole picture, and He understands things we cannot understand.

    2. D.G.Kaye

      Strength in numbers Anne, the power of prayer has mighty strength. I know how comforting it was for me to feel my friends rally around to support with comforting words and prayer. We may not be able to help you fix things but we can send healing prayers and hope that is comforting at this time. God Bless.

  7. Couple's Chronicle

    I join with your prayers. I believe through this, anything is possible. God always listens to every beat of our heart. He is compassionate and merciful.

    Your poem is a wonderful prayer and I know it is powerful.

    God Bless and More Prayers for You and Olivia

    1. annepeterson

      Thank you for reading and for your thoughtful comment. You’re right. God does listen to every beat of our heart. The hearts he created. And He is compassionate and merciful. I also appreciate your prayers for Olivia and for us.

  8. Sal

    Your poem makes my heart bleed,
    somehow when oceans and mountains fall on us, God’s love remains.
    whatever may come, whatever may fall, God will be there
    my heart bleeds for you and your family, I can’t imagine the pain

    1. annepeterson

      Sal,

      You are right. No matter what we go through God’s love remains. And when we don’t understand we end up leaning harder into God. There is a part of me that still hopes the doctors are all wrong. And yet, I know God will be what we need. Because He is our sufficiency.

  9. M.C.Simon

    What a beautiful poem, Anne!!! I had chills while reading… and I have to admit that I still have while writing here.
    My prayers embrace you. No other words can find now.

  10. annepeterson

    Thanks for reading, M.C. And yes, please join us as we pray for a miracle.

    1. M.C.Simon

      I am here, praying! And yes… I believe in Miracles! I believe it with all my heart.

  11. Annie Sterns

    I was reading your prayer and bible verses for hard times. I just recently lost my job. Things will be getting hard soon. I got curious and was reading about you and wanted to tell you how sorry I am about your granddaughter Olivia, one of my favorite names . My husband and I lost our son Andrew Caleb in August of 2012. We don’t know what God knows, we just trust, honor, and obey Him. God Bless.

  12. sajjad

    liked it,Beautiful one, well done !

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